Welcome baby Bronx Mowgli

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/27840950/?GT1=43001
....and here I was thinking we were a colorful people when it came to naming our babies.

The Meanest Thing Ever Said

I've always been one to speak my mind & have many memories of the split and busted lips I suffered during my teen years to prove it.  Those close to me know I'm not one to call shit Shinola (lawd I just dated myself didn't I?), nor will you piss on my head & tell me it raining.  It's just not happening.  I do not sugarcoat....maybe to a fault. 

I do make an honest effort not to be rude, crude or hurtful, but sometimes the truth hurts.   If you ask me, I will be honest.  My close friends and family have learned to tell me first if they just want an ear.  In turn, I've learned to keep my comments to myself.

Muda, my granny, my rock was the person who said the most hurtful thing ever said to me.  One day she was combing my hair (which was no easy task) and she said and I quote, "Your mother had to go & marry the blackest man she could find."  *sigh*  Here I am, not more than 8 or 9 years old wondering what the hell was wrong with my daddy.  I knew she loved my daddy & couldn't figure out why she would say such a thing about him.   Even tho my Grandfather & Step-Grandfather were two of the biggest, blackest men I'd even seen in my life, my granny was still color-struck. 

After that day, I developed terrible complex about my skin-tone & for those who have seen my kin, they can tell you why.  When Papa noticed he said, "Don't worry Pumpkin, the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice."  It was the 1st time I heard that & really didn't understand what it meant. 

Well, I've since gotten over it worrying about something I cannot control & that really shouldn't have bothered me to start with.

I have to admit, I can't help but laugh just a little when my family has to go lay in the sun to get a little color.  (Nothing against my light-skinned sisters & brothers, cause I love y'all too.)

I never got the chance to tell my granny that she really did hurt my feelings, and that I am happy with the skin I'm in....and so are all of my loyal fans! *wink*

A Real Turkey Deal at Deals!

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Other

Spend $10.00 (yes, 10 dollars) at Deals and get a Honeysuckle Young & Tender turkey for $5.00 (yes, 5 dollars)! I got a 13 lb one.

I've been on the phone making calls to my people so they can get the deal. Happy shopping & eating!

Big & Beautiful Woman (BBW) Defined

I’d never even heard the term BBW until I started using Yahoo! back in 2001.  I saw several chat rooms that catered to these BBW and it wasn’t until I sent an IM to a young lady who had BBW as part of screen name, that I learned what it meant.  I started looking around Yahoo! and found many groups that catered to the BBW.  Wow!  I had finally found a place where my 200+ lbs ass would fit in & not be judged according to my dress size.   It was also a place to meet & mingle with the fellas (dubbed BBW Lovers/Admirers) who were attracted to a woman with a lil more than average weight on her.  I also encountered a few who I’d classify as BBW Predators, but that’s another story for another day. 

 

I'm not one to sugarcoat anything, including my weight.  I'm fat.  I've been called everything you can think of – overweight, thick, plump, fluffy, yadda, yadda - bottom line is - I'm fat.

 

There are days when I look in the mirror & feel like Miss Universe.  On these particular days you can’t tell me nothing!  Then there are days when I sigh & wonder.   Most people don’t realize it when looking at me because of the way I carry the weight, but according to the AMA, I am clinically, morbidly obese (BMI is 40+/100+ lbs overweight). 

 

Many moons ago, at 5 foot 8, I was a svelte 135 lbs, not more than 140 lbs…definitely not skinny, but not really thick (by street definition).  Perfect size 10 {or 12 if Muda was buying the clothes}.

 

I was always the biggest & tallest chic in my clique and sometimes felt out of place, but hey, that's what teenagers do.  Once a month water-weight gain would bring tears to my eyes. 

 

I didn’t start to gain weight until my senior year in high school, right after giving birth to my one & only.

 

Now, I’ve seen several people speak on the subject of being/not being a Big & Beautiful Woman/Big Handsome Man (BBW/BHM).  Some of these topics are driven by desires of us who fit into the overweight, obese & even morbidly obese category and the desire to lose weight & become fit.  Some are driven by the way other people look at us simply because we’re fat.  Some people are honest to a fault & some are simply delusional. 

 

Some jackasses are just outright fucking rude.  We need neither judge nor jury telling us that we are fat, need to lose weight, our bodies are a temple, etc. etc.  Hello, Einstein!! Now tell us something we don’t know.   Have you ever stopped to think that maybe, just maybe, we're supposed to be fat? *lol*

 

I will be the 1^st to admit, unlike a lot of my sisters, I do know the difference between thick (which happens one of the most misused terms I’ve ever heard/seen in my life) & fat.  Contrary to popular belief, they are not one in the same.  For those who maybe unsure, here’s my take on it:

 

You are fat if:

• your waistline is the same or larger than your 40+ inch bust line
• your inner thighs applaud when you run down stairs (me!)
• you could start a fire with the friction between said thighs (me!)
• you have trouble bending over (due to belly fat) to tie/buckle your shoes (me!)
• you have no neck
• you cannot feel your collarbone  (heard that from a friend)
• you have a top & bottom stomach (heard that from a different friend & I still bugg up everytime she says it)
• you cannot climb a flight of stairs without gasping for dear life & you aren’t asthmatic
• you need a seat-belt extender on a commercial flight
• you stand in the mirror & must lift your stomach just to see your vagina/penis
• your back fat could pass for a 2^nd set of breasts
• you have man breasts
• you wear low-rise jeans (which yo ass really shouldn’t) and you have that whole muffin top look happening
• you suffer from Dunlap Syndrome (your belly done lapped over your waistband)
• your upper arm fat overlaps your elbows
• your feet look like ham hocks in your shoes
• you cannot comfortably fit in the bathtub (unless you are Shaq)
• you have cracked/broken a toilet bowl
• you cannot use an average store bought scale, considering the good ones don’t max until 310 lbs.)
• you have a handicapped parking placard or plates because you would damn near die and/or your lower extremities couldn’t take it (due to weight) if you had to walk from the far end of the parking lot
• you don't see a doctor regularly because you don't want to know your true weight & you don't want to hear the sermon about how you need to lose it

{Fellas, even tho this is geared towards the sisters, I threw a few bullets in for you as well.}

 

If you fall into even a few of the bullet points above & you still need to/tend to refer to yourself as thick to make you feel better, God bless you.

 

I even knew a chic who was about was 350 lbs. easily and a tad bit shorter than I am, but considers herself “fit” because she had no other health issues.  Ummm ok.  Neither do I, but fit doesn’t describe me or those like me.  I could definitely go on, but I think you get the general idea.

 

Granted, there are some fat folks who really need a reality check, but on the other hand, they are so far gone, there’s nothing you could say to convince them otherwise.

 

Beautiful comes in all shapes, sizes and colors.  You do not have to be a size 0- 12 to be beautiful.  For the record, zero is not a size for a grown woman. It's a cry for help.  (Nah, I'm just kidding as I know a few size zero sisters.)

 

Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly is to the bone. (My t-shirt in the pic reads "I may be big, but you're ugly and I can lose weight!)

 

I just had to get this off my chest & I thank you for listening.

Prisoner: Cell Block H

Prisoner: Cell Block H - Anybody remember this one?

I remember staying up late & watching this with my granny. Well, not actually with her because she thought I was asleep. I had my own room at their house, but I loved sleeping in the big bed with her.

If I'm not mistaken Prisoner came on right after Benny Hill {who, by the way, I couldn't stand}. The only character I really recall is Bea Smith. That was one big, oily, scary looking biznatch. I also remember the inmates always fighting & calling each other bloody cows. At the time, I didn't quite understand what they meant. When I was a kid I took everything literally, so I'm envisioning a bloody cow & couldn't figure out the correlation between the cow & the prisoner. 

Yeah, I know....Mo, take yo ass to bed.

YouTube - U.N.V - Something's Going On

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKYYTIwW7cg

"Our" Little Secret

My sis G told me that I have a heavy heart {her observation after reading my writings & being in my company} & unfortunately, I know she's right.

What I thought was a nightmare, really wasn't.  It was a repressed memory.

When I was about 9 or 10 years old, my mother had a friend named Perry. I never got the impression that he was her boyfriend, but now that I am grown, I know that they had an intimate relationship. I always thought he was a nice man. He always brought me & my sister trinkets, dolls, etc. when he came to visit. Even gave us a few bucks when the bomb-pop truck or Mr. Softee truck came around.

One day he came to see my mom and brought goodies for me & my sis like he always did. I was outside playing & came in to get a drink of water. My mom was in the bathtub {I could hear the water running} and he was sitting in the living room watching TV. He was dressed nice so I think they were probably going out.

As I was drinking my water, he motioned for me to come & sit down. I did. He asked me about school & such. Then he proceeded to tell me how tall I was getting & how pretty I was. As I was telling him about what I was doing in school, he slid his hand between my legs. I had never been so scared in my life. He motioned with shhhhh gesture & I sat there, silenty, tears running down my face.

A few moments later, my mom opened the bathroom door and yelled to him that she'd be out in a minute & closed the door back. He leaned over and whispered, "this is our little secret" in my ear.

When the bathroom door opened again he moved his hand & I ran to my room. I crawled under the sheet & cried. My mom heard me sniffling, because I wasn't a noisy crier. She peeped in my room & asked what was wrong. I told her I fell off of my bike.

After that day, I always made sure that he would never catch me alone & I made sure my sister was with me when he came to our house. Even though I was too afraid to tell what happened to me, I couldn't let it happen to her.

25+ years have come & gone. This is the first time I've ever told anyone about this. I never told my mother, grandparents or uncle. I thought it was my fault for accepting his gifts. I thought it was my fault for wearing shorts. I thought is was my fault for being big for my age. I thought I had done something to deserve this & it was all my fault. So until today, I remained silent.

I now know that it was not my fault & I didn't deserve this. No child does!

I can't begin to tell you how good it feels to finally let this shit go!!!!!!!

I can only hope anyone reading this who has unfortunately had a similar experience will be able to release it and let it go. 

Strappy's, Decorative Bra Straps - Rhinestone, Beaded & Designer

http://www.strappys.com/
For those of you who can pull off strapless & convertible bras.

Why?!?!

You and Me ~ 1975

by The O'Jays

Ever been in love & tried to convince yourself it was over, knowing in your heart & soul it wasn't? If so, this one is for you.

Are You My Sister? Siblings Unknown....

I'm the eldest of my mother's 3 daughters.  We all have different fathers and the younger two were born out of wedlock.  {When we were younger, I was very hateful at times (hush) and would tease my middle sister about her illegitimate status.}

My mother once told me that my daddy suspected he had an older daughter from a relationship prior to marrying my mother.  If I remember correctly, my daddy was never able to confirm or deny fathering this child before he died.  I was too young to really care when my mother 1st told me about it. 

Every now & then I can't help but wonder if I have an older sister out there somewhere. 

All my life I thought my last name was very usual & relatives would be easy to find.  Not so, but thanks to the world wide web, I've learned my surname is not so unusual at all.

I've posted a few messages on a few family websites with the hopes "my sister", her mother or even some other relative would see our father's name & reach out.  Wishful thinking, huh?

 

Lay-A-Way Makes a Comeback

http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Banking/CreditCardSmarts/layaway-makes-a-comeback.aspx
When my son was little & my credit was jacked, I was the lay-a-away queen.

DTV Converter Coupons

https://www.dtv2009.gov/
I ordered mine today & they are scheduled to be mailed 11/28. I'll keep you posted.

Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now!! (My Victory Song)

My friends have posted several videos/songs that reflect their mood after yesterday's victory. Why should I be any different? Like Frankie B (not my daddy..the other one...lol) sang, "We Are One!"

PS I am soooooooooo proud of each & every one of you who stood up & made your mark on this historical event!

I Voted!!!

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Other

Did you?? Casting my ballot took me all of 15 whole minutes!

It's an absolutely gorgeous day in St. Louis!!! No excuses, no exceptions!

Although, I have an advantage (I can see my polling place from my bedroom window), come hell or high water, I was going to the polls.

All I had was my voter registration card (actually had two - the original and the replacement they automatically issued after the last botched elections) & my driver's license. Miss Daisy & Mr. Rufus (don't play, ya'll know you gotta be Medicare eligible to work the polls...) didn't give me any trouble at all about 2 pieces of ID & such.