Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I am Jennifer...and She is Me.

I don't know her personally & probably never will, but my heart is breaking for Jennifer, her loved ones & friends.  With the exception of losing a brother (I never had one), I know exactly what she's going thru.  Maliciously losing a mother & young child, having a sister who seems to choose the wrong men, being the one who identifies the bodies, the one the police & media come to with all the questions, the one who has to take the lead & be in control, the one whom everyone seems to think is the rock & the one they all tend to lean on.

I've shared my story here, but the one thing I didn't mention is the who, as in the lousy bastard who murdered my mother & 10-year old baby sister almost a decade ago.  My middle sister was sleeping with the enemy, literally. 

10 years later & I still can't seem to wrap my mind around & get out what I really want to say.  I can say this - I hope women will wake the hell up & take a little more precaution when getting involved with men who are only out for themselves & mean no earthly good to the women they attract.  

What I went thru & what Jennifer is going thru was no random act of violence - that shit is personal!

I am Jennifer....and she is me.

32 comments:

  1. No words..... *hugs for you and Jennifer*

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  2. ((((((HUG))))) I've been following this story so closely, as it's been all over the news here in Chicago. I've wondered about the guilt that Jennifer's sister MUST be feeling...

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  3. Prayers for your healing, and for her family as well...

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  4. I can't speak for her sister, but my sister has MAJOR issues and will never quite be the same.

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  5. ((Hugs)) I thought about you and your situation as this was playing out in the media.

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  6. Yanno, it just all seems so unfair. Like a cruel trick has been played on her. Here she is, this nobody, no one knew of, until one day, the best thing that could have happened to her is that she got voted off of American Idol and her career skyrocketed from there. And now this. I think one of the most devastating things about this is realizing that stardom and success, the kind that she experienced, doesn't keep you from being able to escape this kind of madness.

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  7. You are so right! No one is immune. The day my world was shattered, all I could think to say was, "Jesus help me. This happens to other people, not me."

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  8. It's bad enough that Mom and Bro got killed, but how in God's name could you kill a child?

    Dang...

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  9. Not a day goes by that I don't wonder the same. My grandfather used to say, "Some folks are just born evil." I tend to believe him.

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  10. Girl you know my mind was on YOU since this happened, I thought about your mother and Tyra and was hoping you would be alright. I know this opened up old wounds. This is such a horrible thing, where are we going as a human race? Animals have more compassion than humans. It is sickening. I pray for the family, this is horrible!

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  11. We normal people might be horrified at such a thought, but for a criminal mind of that kind who already did the absolute horrendous, he didn't have a choice. It was an act of criminal desperation, he knew he killed somebody's famous mother and sister, he knew that extra police attention was going to be given to the case, he couldn't possibly risk a potential witness being left alive... it was the only logical choice FOR HIM.

    As much as I held out hope and prayed that that child would be spared that man's madness, I already knew what had happened. I knew it was a done deal when he stopped cooperating, that baby was already gone. *sighs*

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  12. Its been a sad week..I just lost someone close .. a friend of mine just lost her father now this .. Prayers and warm thoughts for you and yours...

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  13. I was wondering when you were going to say something. I like Dawn have been worrying how you would take all of this and literally relive it being that you can't escape it due to the news being everywhere. I can't tell you not to think about it. I can't tell you to act like it didn't happen. All I can do is give you a hug from afar and tell you I love you and it will get a lil easier.

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  14. As I watched this story unfold, I found myself praying not only for Jennifer and her family, but for you as well. I knew with every piece to the puzzle, it pulled off a scab from your wounds. The events are nearly parallel.

    I feel deeply for you all because I have absolutely no idea what you are going through and can only offer my sympathy. It takes an extremely strong and faithful person to go through this and still stand tall. Even when you find yourself falling, know your friends are here for you. I love you Monni.

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  15. As many times as I've talked to you about this I never knew the culprit was someone your sister was seeing. That gives me a sense of everything and helps me to understand a lil more about why you feel the way you do.

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  16. Your granddaddy was right. They are! That's why you must constantly be armed and covered in the blood.

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  17. My sister happen to read Jennifer sisters myspace page where she says her ex was trife, and her son was her whole world.

    I'm sure this story will touch many people who have to live with this horrible situation. It's simply tragic.

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  18. MsMo (((((Hugs))))) because I know when you heard about this situation it just tore your heart apart.

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  19. I agree. Since his DNA will naturally already be in the house since he lived there, this will probably be a very difficult case to prove. His mother is already proclaiming her son's innocence.

    And again, we see how where the need for a man, any man, leads women down unholy paths with their choices...not necessarily negatively affecting THEM, but those she claims to love.

    MsMo, I didn't know the details of your story, but I'm sorry you had to experience a similar tragedy. The choices people make in the name of "love" have proven to be the most deadly and fatal around. There are many days I struggle to understand this.

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  20. They are reporting now that the domestic argument leading to this tragedy was around a car payment. *sigh*

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  21. You're right...

    My condolences and my heart goes out to both of you.

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  22. Some things I will NEVER understand....

    My grandfather used to say that there are 10 million cars to buy in this world.. .You bought this one, you'll buy another one....

    It boggles my mind to think that three human lives were lost for a ton of STEEL.

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  23. As you already know I ALWAYS pray for you about what happened and how you deal with the loss and with your family now. I instantly thought about you and prayed for you and Jennifer's family. The Lord IS the true healer in this and ANY situation.

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  24. I thought of your story when I first heard...and I wept for both you & jennifer. I can't imagine what such a tragedy feels like. Every time I see the story I cry, and just start praying. My mom was killed when I was just a baby and it hurts to think of it...but I can't imagine that loss as an adult. *hugging & praying for everyone the story has touched in a personal way*

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  25. A car payment? You don't kill folks over a car payment!!!

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  26. When you perceive that people are threatening your manhood and/or your livelihood (which far too many folks tie to material or financial possessions) then yes, you ARE driven to kill over those things.

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  27. so very sad.... praying for healing even now... for the Hudson family as well as you and yours...

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  28. My Lord! Definitely praying for healing for you, as well as the Hudson family.

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  29. You know, I'm thinking this was the dream was about.

    I'm here Monni 24/7...

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  30. You know Monni, when i heard about his I immediately thought about you and your story. I started praying for the both of you because i am sure the pain will never end....I have been on Julia Hudson's myspace page and also Jennifer's myspace page and for the life of me I DO NOT understand how Julia Hudson can be online on myspace at a time when her son was missing and also now that he was found murdered. I was on last night and she was logged on at the same time I was. I know that if it were me myspace will be the last place on my mind!!!

    May God continue to Bless YOU and keep you and wrap his arms around you when you need Him too!

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